I had a friend who mentioned to me when I was pregnant that I better not be one of those women that fall victim to the “Mommy-Cult” as so many of her other friends had. I promised I wouldn’t except one of two things happened. Either I wasn’t given the How to Avoid the Mommy-Cult manual or, falling victim to the Mommy-Cult is accomplished by the mere fact of being a mother or by doing such unforgivable things like posting too many updates about your kid on Facebook via status updates, videos or photos. As an aside, not that an aside is really required, but when the majority of your family is almost 2000 km away, this is one of the few ways to keep your family involved in the above mentioned kid’s life.
I realized I must have done the unforgivable and fallen victim to the “Mommy-Cult”, which is the only reason why I can figure out why that same friend defriended me on Facebook. Yes, there’s a lot of Clara but it’s not all Clara. And even if it was, that alone constitutes defriending?
Of course, my involvement in the “Mommy-Cult” might run deeper than even I realize and perhaps I was defriended for unforgivable actions that I’m not aware of because I’ve been sucked into the pink cotton cloud haze of “Mommy-Cult”. Maybe, maybe not.
For whatever reason, it doesn’t matter. Every last person on my friend list on Facebook could defriend me and I’d keep posting status updates, videos and photos of Clara. I wouldn’t care because when it comes to Clara, being her mom is more important to me than being anyone’s friend. Actually that’s not true. I would care. I do care. I care very much that a friendship that I actually cared about (and thought that I had nurtured and invested time in) had more weight and be a little more forgiving than it’s proven to be. I do care, except. I don’t care enough.
So “Mommy-Cult” it is. It’s certainly not the wasteland it’s threatened to be, or as self-deprecating as implied. In fact, I quite like it here, and will be here for a while.