A friend lent me a pregnancy book this weekend that claims that at sixteen weeks, the baby growing inside me is the size of a small gerbil. I was horrified when I read that to Tay, much preferring the produce comparison that most books and websites stick too. According to them, the baby is about the size of an avocado and that is a MUCH better comparison for me, and not just because I love avocados.
Of course, the avocado comparison is quickly becoming inaccurate – I hit the seventeen week mark on Sunday, and according to the produce classifications, we’re now talking turnips.
I’m not as big of a fan of turnip as I am avocados however.
I’ve been purposely quiet on this blog about the fact that I am pregnant, and have been for just over four months now, and I’ve done this for various reasons. Mostly, it’s because I don’t want to be one of those pregnant women/new mothers that only talk about their child, whether it’s inside them still or attached to their hip. And I don’t think this is anything new – I’ve always been very clear to seperate the things in my life that are all encompassing for a period of time with the regular flow of my blog. The best example I can think of was my wedding blog, but I had other blogs, for things like exercise, knitting, writing, reading etc. This blog is about me as a person (well okay, so lately it’s been about me as the gardener 😉 not me as the bride, the runner, the writer, the knitter, the amateur chef. Nor is it a blog about me as a mother (or mother-to-be).
When I told my sister that I was creating a new blog for the pregnancy and the baby, she asked why I had to have a bunch of blogs, and wanted to know why I couldn’t just blog about everything on one main blog, saving the people that read my blog the hassle of tracking all my different blogs. Maybe I could be more like Dooce, she suggested, because she loved reading Heather’s blog since it was all in one place. And yes, I suppose I could be like Dooce but for a while there, when Dooce was all about the pregnancy and subsequent arrival of her new baby, I got tired of reading it. I thought if I read one more pregnancy post that I would lose my mind and when I’d had enough, I started reading her blog less and less. Or reading it less frequently.
I don’t have a million people following me on Twitter (I’m not even on Twitter) nor do I have comments on my blogs in the THOUSANDS, nor do I make a living off my blog. But I DO have a few people that seem to be pretty loyal readers (even the anonymous posters and the lurkers) and the last thing I want is to lose them to incessant baby talk.
It’s not who I am. So I started my pregnancy blog and shared the link to a select few, and said in the email that I sent out that I wouldn’t be offended if they didn’t use the link and I didn’t see comments from them on any of my posts. I’m taking this stance for two reasons, the first being that I get that pregnancy and the talk related to it is not for everyone but secondly, and perhaps the more important reason, is that the pregnancy blog is not for them, it’s for me, and for my husband and for our unborn child. It’s a momento that I will cherish, and will look back upon over the next few years, and will share with my child when he/she is old enough.
But there’s no denying that this pregnancy business is taking over my life in a very big way and I couldn’t imagine not acknowledging it on this blog in some form or another. So here we are, a random post that says, Hey, I’m pregnant! But don’t worry, you won’t be subjected to incessant pregnancy chatter every time you open my site. Instead, you get to read long, boring posts about my garden. Except that I DO have a post in mind that relates to my trip to Halifax and how I took my nephews to Taking Woodstock on a rainy Saturday afternoon and bought them a large pizza to share, along with super sized cokes which I let them refill AND a bag of Skittles. And how, at the end of the movie, the thirteeen year old looked at me and said, “THAT WAS AWESOME.” His comment probably had something to do with his unexpected education on acid and hash brownies and hippies dancing naked in a field.
Below are some of the questions and comments that I’ve received so far, which may or may not save the people that read this blog from asking their own. It’s like a dozen posts in one, and hopefully not quite so boring.
When are you due?
The obvious question. February 14th – except my OB says I have a 4% chance of delivering then.
How am I feeling?
Better than I ever expected to feel. I’ve not thrown up a single time and have only had the occasional nausea. I’ve had minor symptoms that a lot of women complain about (gas, constipation, heartburn etc etc) but it’s been very occasional and very manageable. I did come down with a brutal head cold this weekend and I’ve been fairly miserable because of it. I haven’t been sick in 18+ months and all I can take is Tylenol, which helps a bit but not a lot.
Was this baby planned or an accident? (This question came from my favorite aunt, who leaned in close, and with her hand on my arm, asked it in a very quiet voice).
This baby was very much planned. Not only did we try for two years to get pregnant, but the eight months before we conceived was spent at a fertility clinic where I went through a battery of tests and cycle monitoring and drugs and a painful laparosopy that determined that I had endometrosis and both my fallopian tubes were stuck down. My doctor treated the endo and three months later, I was pregnant.
It took you long enough, it’s about time, and what took you so long?
Yep, I’m fully aware that I’ll be thirty-four on my birthday (which is on Thursday) and that I’ve theoretically been racing the clock. I’ve also had the ultrasound and part one of two blood tests to determine if my age is putting the baby at risk. But I was still 31 when I went off birth control and we started trying and at the time, that didn’t seem so old. And of course, we had no idea that it would take so long.
Have I gained any weight, am I showing?
I haven’t really gained any weight so far – I lost 4lbs in the first 2-3 weeks of finding out and have gradually gained 6lbs back, so as far as my OB is concerned, I’m +2lbs and she’s very happy with that. I think in the past week I’ve just started to show and the other night, we were out with another couple and I caught the female glancing discretely at my waistline (they hadn’t heard the news yet) which was my first indication that I am showing. But the next day, I went to visit a friend and her mother and grandmother, and all three of them insisted that I wasn’t showing and that it was hard to believe that I was pregnant.
Will I find out the gender of the baby, do I have a preference, and what do I think I’m having?
It’s no coincidence that I’ve been called Monica (off of Friends) when it comes to me planning things. Tay’s a planner as well, so of course we’re going to find out. I never used to believe it when couples would say that they didn’t care what they were having as long as the baby was healthy but I understand now how they can feel that way. We had one scare during the pregnancy so far that made me realize that it didn’t matter what gender the baby was, I just want him/her to be healthy. Originally, I always wanted to have a girl and because of that, I’ve convinced myself that we’re having a boy. But more and more lately, I’m becoming very excited about the idea of the baby being a boy.
Do we have names picked out?
We’re hoping to find out the gender when we go for the 18 week ultrasound next week. If the baby’s a girl, we’ve pretty much agreed to name the baby after my grandmother (Clara). If it’s a boy – who knows. Both Tay and I are coming up with names we like and we’ll discuss. I do have two names that I love so far, but I’m waiting to hear Tay’s names before I reveal mine to him.
Will I have a midwife or an OB?
I tried for a midwife, calling when I was 8weeks and there was already a waiting list for February, which they put me on. I was disappointed because I had decided long ago that I would want a midwife, but I didn’t realize that there’s a shortage of them in my area. I did, however, find an OB that was rated and highly recommended online so I asked my fertility specialist for a referral and she got me one and after meeting with her last week, I LOVE her. I’ve also pretty much secured a doula to assist with the birth – she’s a former yoga/pilates teacher of mine from the gym I go too and she’s currently training to be a doula.
Will I have a natural birth or one with drugs?
I’ve been doing a lot of reading, asking a lot of questions and have pretty much decided to at least try and have a natural birth, despite the looks I am getting from female friends that think I am crazy for wanting to attempt it.
Have I had any cravings?
Not really. Certainly nothing that has me sending out my husband in the middle of the night, which I don’t see me doing at any point really. I went through a phase where all I wanted was sour things – pickles, lemonade, sour candies – but that was around 8 weeks and it’s long gone. I’ve also had a thing for Zesty Cheese doritoes, periodically, but for the most part, I can resist those things for a few days or even a week or so before I give in and indulge, so I’m not convinced they’re actual cravings.
Will I continue exercising?
Absolutely – everything I’ve read indicates that exercise throughout pregnancy will make labor easier. I’ve also read that women who exercise 3 times a week for a minimum of 20 minutes right up to their due date have a good chance of delivering early – I’m all over the thought of not having to be induced and delivering a smaller baby than if I were to go full-term or beyond (and risk having to be induced, which I don’t want). I still run 3 miles on the treadmill at the gym, which I’m trying to do 2-3 times a week and I still go to my weightlifting class (the infamous Body Pump) 2-3 times a week. I was working out 6 days a week pregnancy, now I’m down to about 5 times a week except the past 2-3 weeks because of the trip to Halifax and then my getting sick. There’s also a yoga class during lunch hours 2x a week at my work that I want to start taking, and a swimming pool, so that if running gets to be too much, I have a convenient alternative.
Am I taking pictures? Do I have ultrasound photos?
I’m not taking photos of my belly yet because even at 17 weeks, it doesn’t quite have that roundness that I can’t wait for and instead kind of just looks like chub. As soon as it’s round and firm and very clearly a baby, I will take photos and post them at my pregnancy blog. But I do have the ultrasound photos, and a photo of the positive pregnancy tests that I took on June 7th.